Gary Ives

Gary Ives lives with his wife and two dogs in the Ozarks where he grows apples and writes.

Stories by Gary Ives

Yard Dogs

Illustrated by Joe Zabel

Haymore, lissen. You hear me? This here is the onliest phone call I kin have. Whaddisit you want now, Rhonda Jo? $400. I’m in the fuckin’ lock up, Haymore. Two deputies and some Barney Fife lookin’ asshole from Animal Control come by early this morning.’ They carried me off to jail. Jail, Haymore, I’m inna goddam JAIL…. Calm …

A Hog’s Heart

Illustrated by Cait Maloney

Paco fumbled with the orange package of ramen noodles. These boogers were tough to open sober, never mind drunk. Besides, he felt like shit.Wobbling under the dim overhead kitchen light he braced himself against the sink and worked open the pack with the point of the butcher knife. Something inside was fucked up. Maybe it …


Illustrated by Cait Maloney

I won’t tell you in which city the events in this story occurred. It was Christmas time, someplace far away, okay? You’ll understand. Call me Andy. I’m a 23 year old healthy dude and a licensed pedicab operator which means I haul fat-assed tourists around in a fucking basket. The dozen pedicabs which are the …

Jeopardy Double

Illustrated by Cait Maloney

Six years ago the Jeopardy bus came to the Gulf Coast. Jerry, my identical twin, drove over and spent the day at the Holiday Inn in Mobile taking written tests and competing with a herd of other nerds and ending up getting selected. The next week he got a registered letter from Los Angeles with …

Through the Storm

Illustrated by Mike S. Young

Just before sunset she smelled the coming rain and pedaled faster. Eleven kilometers more to the British camp at Lac du Nord; she was going to get wet. The officer had written the message on his camp table with a fountain pen on coarse paper which was the rough stock used to wrap candles in …